Wednesday, October 6, 2010


Couldn't take it.
I was at a familiar place. Outside. Sitting at a table. Not proud of being there, I was with a close friend of mine. Others who had shown up were just some people I had met, throughout the year. I had gotten to know them, a little better, over the summer. There were still one or two people that I had not previously made any attempt to meet, at all. Really, though, I could not tell if there was any actual figure that I cared enough about. Sorry, I was just a little bit uncomfortable, for a few reasons.

Things were going ok. My friend and I talked about things that would always matter, to us. We exchanged subtle ideas and just general things that we both considered to be "neat". Actually, looking back, I can not remember anything specific. There was no telling when I stopped paying attention to the conversation. I was interested, but things started to go on. Personally, I thought I was pulling a prank on myself- breathing heavily and what not. Lost my vision for a moment. At one point, all I could do was hear and not listen. Left eyebrow started to twitch. My stomach felt awful.
There it went.

I could have stayed at this point for a while, but then I looked two inches to the right. One of the people I really had no intentions of knowing, was just sitting there. Oh, God. Exhaustion topped it off. A hooded sweatshirt. Absolutely covered in graphic designs. No, that is average. It was just that i was going to have to talk to him, eventually. Sitting in the same area as this man placed a burden onto me. The way things were going, I would eventually find out where he is from and maybe even something funny about his damned name. Questionable ethnicity, that is the worst part. No, that is ok. His laughter. Those awfully regular teeth. Expected teeth, for this man. Someone made a reference to something popular. He begins to laugh. Nope. That was all.

At that moment, I locked my mouth into a phoney smile, rose up, and shook violently from side to side. "Teeth! Teeth! Teeth! Head! Head! Head! Head!", I shouted. These people do not deserve my company. Who, here, am I trying to impress? I, then, leaned toward the man and went ahead and slapped him in his face as hard as humanly possible. When my hand returned to my side, I quickly began to do what can be described as erratic dance moves. Laughter. Ok, then. I turned around, walked to a table, and grabbed two cups of incredibly hot coffee. The two young women, that the cups belonged to, did not react. As I grasped the paper cups, I made sure to squeeze them so that the lids would simply pop off. I took both cups, and crushed them directly onto my chest. The scorching hot liquid would meet my amazing man bosom, almost as if I was going for some stupid "bra" joke. Third degree burns, lovely!

I let my eyebrows drop, as I started to stare everyone else down. My eyes fell upon some white kid who was playing with a knife, earlier. "Give it," I demanded, and I snatched it from him. I turned and looked right at my close friend. Somehow, he provoked these horrible, breathy, screeching and slobbering noises as I completely jammed the knife right into my own cheek. Twisted it. I yanked it out, looked at it, and commenced to slice off my bottom lip. That was when I turned to see a woman that I am very attracted to. I saw her, and I jumped to restrain her where she sat. Holding her hair back, I shoved my severed bottom lip into her face, shouting, "eat it! You dee-zerz it! Gnah on it! Gnah on it!". The fool.

As soon as I was done with her, I hopped off of her chair and jumped toward an empty table. My plan was to throw the table, maybe. Just then- some very old man walked up and continued to unbutton his large jacket. I saw horrifying things in there. This was really it. He was standing there, looking in my direction. No reason for this man to own a jacket with buttons. My eyes were fixated upon the unreasonable visions that began to play inside of his coat. This was the only time that I actually felt that my bottom lip was completely removed. Time had no idea what it was doing at this point. This moment went on for what seemed like months. Looking back, it felt as though all atoms and molecules that made up that moment were taking shifts, collaborating and producing this feature. Slam. His last button was unbuttoned. I really wish I had better appreciated that moment in which Time, itself, fumbled awkwardly around its new office. This next moment was much worse.

The man finally finished taking his garment completely off. Once it was off, an un-mistake-able horror actually spilled from right out of his abdomen. It was dark chocolate Reese's cups!!
Happy Halloween, y'all.

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