Monday, October 2, 2017

On Details Surrounding the Birth of Yelmac Tobias

     The life of Yelmac Tobias, while short and pathetic by common standards, is often painted by his legion of biographers with that quail-quilled brush known as Enigma. And it is certain that there is much in his life which remains to be explained. But, until now, the Tobiassic canon has suffered from the lack of a certain sort of insight - a certain hovering filmic archive, available for detailed inspection while situated at any coordinates in the temporal stream of history. Though I still rely on the vast body of tomes written on the subject of Yelmac Tobias, I have been endowed with a most curious 'sight' into the bargain. And, while I am sure that I will gradually expose the critical method of 'looking' that gave me access to such a sight, I had better leave such exposures in the deep background, where only the most curious and determined readers of this case history will chance upon them:

     Yelmac Tobias was born on the littered shores of Lake Peipus in Lohusuu, Estonia. The birth occurred on August 8, 1985; the birth of Yelmac Tobias occurred on that day at 8:15 p.m.

     He was brought into the world fatherless, though the Tobias name had come from his father. Many dedicated Tobiasists have fallen into poverty and mental decay in their various searches for the identity of this man. Out of respect for dead colleagues, I will save this knowledge, though hilariously close at hand, for a later expansion in the record.

     But what of his mother, Delilah? A pale sixth-generation Irish tobacconist from the riverside hovels of Bridgeport, she spent much of her free time in the Chicago-O'Hare terminals, where she pleased herself with stalking weary travelers, hoping to inherit their leftover pies, hoagies, and Vienna Red Hots.

     Indeed, it was a pure accident that she happened to infiltrate a flight destined for Estonia a week before Yelmac's sluggish intrusion upon our world through the lips of her wispy, freckled vulva. On that thunderous day in the airport, so humid after repeated torrential downpours that the mammoth windows looking out onto the tarmac were marbled with dribbling condensation, Delilah caught such concrete whiffs of fast food and snack goods, that her nostrils positively gammed like mouths masticating a meal.

     Shortly after her arrival, she spotted a man in a dark suit and a black velvet sailor's cap, schmoozing on a bloated, creamy eclair. And it was that patisserie scent of mammaries, oven-browned bread, and toasted sugar which filtered the woman's consciousness down to a pinprick of light in the center of her internal screen. She followed the man onto the plane; the man himself never turned around to observe her. In the row just behind him, she dropped her body into a seat that had gone unbooked.

     Even from a head-on, eye-level vantage point, one would have seen what she saw: the untrimmed muff of his sandy hair, surging out of the back of his black velvet sailor's cap, the eclair lodging deeper into his unseen mouth at a snail's millimetric pace.

     But, yes, that is how it happened that Delilah Tobias came to be in Lohusuu, Estonia at the start of the young Yelmac's life.

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